What Do You Do When People Break Your Heart?

There is a particular truth that is harder for us than most other truths to grasp. It’s probably because we were created and designed for community and when sin creeps in and does what it does with it’s toxic and deadly venom, we shrink back in a helplessly broken cower tangled in paralyzed fear over how things should be but aren’t.

The truth is, people are going to break your heart.

Whether it’s the child who doesn’t head the advice, the spouse that makes you feel unworthy of fighting for, a sibling who tosses weaknesses and insecurities around to tally points in an argument, a friend that walks away, or a parent that feels more like a child.

People are people and hearts are fragile and the broken world that spins us all around breaks us piece by piece as we inflict our brokenness onto others and break them too.

There’s no rhyme or reason as to why we endure the breaking, we just do. We break. And regardless of how hard we fight and work and put in and pour out – it seems the people we love the most always disappoint us the deepest. Maybe it’s because we hold them the closest to our hearts that our hearts break the most when they disappoint us. When they fling and flail and wreak havoc on our expectations.

It’s a hard reality to grapple with and the only consultation is that while our human relationships can be reflective of God’s heavenly one, it is not always so. The pain inflicted by other humans is impossible for God to inflict. He can’t help it – “if we are faithless, he remains faithful— for he cannot deny himself.” (2 Timothy 2:13) It’s just Who He is and He can’t be anything but perfect and consistent, “there is no variation or shadow due to change”. (James 1:17)

When humans fail us, because even the very best of them will, all we can do is rest in the One Who won’t. It is only there that the brokenness of community and relationships can be restored.


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